Successful Smuggler o.O?

Juan comes up to the Mexican border on his bicycle. He's got two large bags over his shoulders. The guard stops him and says, "What's in the bags?" "Sand," answered Juan.

The guard says, "We'll just see about that - get off the bike!" The guard takes the bags and rips them apart; he empties them out and finds nothing in them but sand. He detains Juan overnight and has the sand analyzed, only to discover that there is nothing but pure sand in the bags. The guard releases Juan, puts the sand into new bags, hefts them onto the man's shoulders, and lets him cross the border.

The next day, the same thing happens. The guard asks, "What have you got?" "Sand," says Juan. The guard does his thorough examination and discovers that the bags contain nothing but sand. He gives the sand back to Juan, and Juan crosses the border on his bicycle.

This sequence of events is repeated every day for a year.

Finally, Juan doesn't show up one day and the guard runs into him in a Cantina in Mexico. "Hey, Buddy," says the guard, "I know you are smuggling something. It's driving me crazy. It's all I think about..... I can't sleep. Just between you and me, what are you smuggling?"

Juan sips his beer and says, "Bicycles."

I have to whisper... XD

A mother took her little boy to church.

While in church the little boy said, "Mommy, I have to pee."

The mother said to the little boy, "It's not appropriate to say the word 'pee' in church.
So, from now on whenever you have to 'pee' just tell me that you have to 'whisper."

The following Sunday, the little boy went to church with his father and during the service said to his father, "Daddy, I have to whisper."

The father looked at him and said, "Okay, why don't you whisper in my ear."

Hole in One

There was an American man that had an meeting in France. He met a woman and that night they had their own meeting. While they were where having sex, she was yelling, "TROU FAUX,TROU FAUX."

He did not know what that meant, but assumed it to be some sort of praise.

The next day, he went to play golf with the men he had the meeting with. One of them made a hole in one.

He yelled, "TROU FAUX,TROU FAUX !"

They looked at him and said, "what do you mean wrong hole?"

Hokkien Lang Rulez~ :P

Dear Hokkien speaking friends,Laugh until you kee siao!

Ah Lian kar ho big brother Ah Beng over the telephone.

Lian: "Ah Beng tua kor, lim bu beh eh get my new jig saw puzzle fixed eh, mahchiam all the edges cannot fix together, lah."

Beng: "Jig saw puzzle si mi picture, ha?"

Lian: "The box show a big kokokkeh lo, kanna like the one in talkingcock.com."

Beng: "Okay, lah, okay, lah. I come over to tor long lu, lah."

Ah Beng arrives at Ah Lian's place, where she happily leads him to the kitchen table where the jigsaw puzzle is.Ah Beng examines the puzzle and says, "Si gi na, si bek gong, put back the corn flakes into the box, lah."

**********

QUESTION: How do you know frogs are Hokkien?
ANSWER : Because when it's cold, they go "kwah, kwah, kwah".

QUESTION : How do Hokkien prawns laugh?
ANSWER: Hae hae hae (hokkien for prawns)

QUESTION: How do Hokkien fish laugh?
ANSWER : Hu hu hu (hokkien for fish)

And here is a classic..............
QUESTION : What's the difference between Ang-mor and Hokkien fairy Tales?
ANSWER: Ang-mor fairy tales begin with "Once upon a time..." and Hokkien fairy tales begin with "Lim Peh ka li kong..."


Got the joke ?

the girl call the brother up to fix the puzzle for her.. her brother ask what does the puzzle looks like..she say looks like a chicken.. his brother go back to the house lor.. then found out tat..her sister is playing with corn flakes..

Mongolian VD, a.k.a. STD

An American tourist goes on a trip to China.While there, he is sexually promiscuous and doesn't use a condom.

A week after arriving home, he finds his penis is covered with bright green spots. Horrified, he goes to see his doctor.Days later the doctor calls and says, "I've got bad news. You've contracted Mongolian VD. It's very rare. We know little about it. We have to amputate your penis."

The next day, the man seeks out a Chinese doctor, figuring he'll know more about the disease.The Chinese doctor examines him and proclaims, "Ah, yes, Mongolian VD."

"What can you do?" asks the man. "My American doctor wants to amputate!"

The Chinese doctor shakes his head and laughs, "Stupid American doctors always want to operate. Make more money that way. No need to operate!"

"Oh, thank God!" the man replies.

"Yes!" says the Chinese doctor. "You no worry! Wait two weeks. Dick fall off by itself!"

SNAKE enter CAVE!, see lar

There was a small little kid,he was oni 3 years old.

One day his father went to work and his mother is bathing he was scared and knocked the door.His mom open the door and let him go in.He started to ask question.The boy asked "mami what is the two thing hanging on ur body?".

The mom said "son this is 2 canon balls.

The boy ask again "what is the bushy thing over there?".The mom said "erm,is juz a cave son".

The next day,his mother went to market to buy things.His father was bathing and he was scare again.He knock the door and his father let him in.He started to ask question again.

The boy asked "wad is the long thing hanging there?". The father say "nth son is juz a snake".

One night his parents are having sex the boy woke up and went to the parents room. When the parents saw him come in they quickly use the sheet and cover theirself.

The son took it off and say...


"MAMI the snake is entering the cave Fire the canonball!!".

IQ Questions.... XD

during coffee time... the menager walked near 4 female collegues and asked : " Pretty ladies... why don't i ask you some IQ questions?" "okay" replied the girls...

so he started... "Guess something on humans body: Upper side got hair... Bottom side got hair... At night then the hair would touch hair...

"haha... Manager you are horny... I won't come again already!"

u know the answer???

"Wei... don't think wrongly... the answer is "eyes"..


*********************

Manager played the IQ question again..." Pretty ladies over here... lets answer some questions... Guess something located on a body... : when u lick it it's hard... when u don't lick it it's also hard... when you want to sleep... have to brush it..."

The girls started to blush

"Aiyer...!! don't wan to come already... U are horny!!!"

"Wei... where did you think until... the answer is "teeth" lar!"