Educated or ordinary man .... ?

A Taiwanese man with very poor, practically no, English knowledge once visited the United States. His name happened to be:Teng Xiao Ping.

At the Immigration, the officer asked him a few questions to verify his trueintention of coming to the US:-

First he was asked:"What is the last name of our first President?" Not knowing English neither what was the question, he guessed they must have asked him for his family name. So he replied:"Wa Sing Teng."(in Hokkien meaning My Last Name is Teng). The officer heard of "Washington!"(same sound) so passed him of the first question.

Second question was:"What do u come to the US for?" This time the Taiwanese thought, naturally he wud be asked of his first name. So he replied:"Xiao Ping." The officer heard of:"Shopping!"

so nodded and proceeded with his third question."What car do u drive back home?" The tourist thought he was asked of his marital status, so he exclaimed: "Wa Bo Bo."(in Hokkien meaning I have no wife).

And the officer heard of: "Volvo!"
So smiled with compliment and asked again.

The fourth question was:"Who is the most popular basket ball player here in the US?" By this time our Taiwanese friend was getting a bit impatient and annoyed hence shouted:"Mai Ho Wa Ja Dan."(meaning Don't let me here wait).
The officer heard of:"Michael Jordan!"

With great appreciation of this tourist's wide knowledge, the officer let him passed without further harassment.

The Eight Qualities Of A Perfect Boyfriend/Husband, for women...and maybe gays ^

The Eight Qualities Of A Perfect Boyfriend / Husband


Brave
Intelligent
Gentle

Polite
Energetic
Nutty
Industrious
Sensitive


And if all else fails, well ... read the CAPITAL LETTERS only!!

Talking about SEX ?

A bus stops and 2 Italian men get on it. They sit down and engage in an animated conversation. The lady sitting next to them ignores them at first, but her attention is galvanized when she hears one of them say the following:

'Emma come first. Den I come. Den two asses come together. I come once-a-more! Two asses, they come together again. I come again and pee twice. Then I come one lasta time.'


The lady can't take this any more, 'You foul-mouthed sex obsessed pig,' she retorted indignantly.
'In this country, we don't speak aloud in public places about our sex lives.'


'Hey, coola down lady,' said the man.
'Who talkin' abouta sex? I'm a justa tellin' my frienda how to spell 'Mississippi '

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